Alright already. Alright. I'll stop being such a lame, obnoxious whiner. Also, I'll stop pretending I'm 12 instead of 32.968 (actually 32.969 (leap year)) years old. I'm not entirely certain I can shoulder all of the blame though for that last post. I mean, come on. A Power Point Presentation on giving Power Point Presentations? That's just asking for it.
Also, in case any future employers are reading this (which would be really impressive since it'd mean you'd be digging a good 12 months back and that means you either really want to hire me, considered hiring me but now have Growing Concern that maybe I have mental Turret's or are never going to hire me but find yourself completely unable to resist my wit and charms) it seems prudent to say here and now that I don't actually have a drinking problem. The only kind of drinking problem I have is that I completely abhor the taste of alcohol and therefore can't actually drink at all. This has presented itself as a problem at several different times in my life. Also, I do not have an elicit, clandestine pill popping problem. I don't actually do methamphetamines. I'm actually extremely boring and sedate and have to make up BLATANT LIES about myself in order to feel funny. Telling everyone how I organize my closet by both size and color, always clean the litter box and make up interactive pie charts for my Daily Activities? Totally not funny.
Occasionally pretending to be Chuck Bukowski? F-ing hilarious.
